Steel Dawn (1987)

I had really wanted to review this one back during our Swayze tribute in September, but Netflix had it set on Very Long Wait, so we replaced it with a suggestion by RepoGenetic, Black Dog, which worked out just as well. Anyway, Very Long Wait then turned into Unavailable, and I put it out of my mind. That was until this week, when I found it on Hulu. Yes!

Steel Dawn is a post-apocalyptic action deal where Patrick Swayze plays a WWIII vet wandering the desert. He comes across a water treatment type farm, run by a woman, her son, and a foreman (Brion James). Swayze is taken on to work for food, and he discovers that one: she is one of many such farms terrorized by a local warlord that they hope to defeat; and two: she has a natural spring underneath her land that could irrigate the entire region, making it invaluable. At the same time, this woman discovers one: Swayze is not just a wandering farmhand, he can really kick ass; and two: she's been too long without the love of a man, and Swayze's visit couldn't be more fortuitous. Things get a little tougher when the local warlord calls in a reject from a hair band making ends meet as an assassin. Can Swayze take this guy down and protect the farm?



How awesome is this? It's like your classic post-apocalypse desert action flick/Mad Max rip-off, only with Swayze at the helm. And he brings it like he does in everything else he does. Sure, it might not be Road House, but how much is, right? I'm fully convinced his hero in this film was Kevin Costner's inspiration for his role in Waterworld, and comparing the two makes me appreciate even more just how great Swayze was, and how much he'll be missed. Throw in the late great Brion James, and you've got a winner, hands down.

But when you get down to brass tacks, this film would be crap without Swayze. The scenes with no action would be dumb. The retread of a plot would've been less bareable. For instance, there was a low-speed chase on these vehicles that looked like they were stolen in the middle of the night off the Mad Max set, which was definitely still ridiculous, but when you add Swayze into it, it has a level of awesomeness that it wouldn't otherwise have, even with someone as great as Dolph. Should we be surprised though? He made a film about a legendary bouncer into classic. I could add some glib statement here about how we never realize how special these guys are until it's too late, but that's not the case with Swayze. It's more a case of I have trouble watching films like this and reconciling them with the reality that he's no longer with us, and will no longer give performances like this.



Speaking of no longer with us, there's DTVC favorite Brion James. I can't believe that this August will mark 11 years since he passed away. In Steel Dawn he plays a good guy, which is a change of pace from what we're used to with him. Over the course of his life, he had 200+ acting credits in everything from feature films, DTV fare, and TV shows. A consummate professional, and a character actor of the highest order. If you don't love Brion James, you don't love yourself.

I'm not sure if you've seen Religulous yet, but whether you have or haven't, my referencing it here won't get overly political or be a comment on my own thoughts on religion. What I wanted to bring up was one of the overarching themes of Bill Maher's film, the idea that many religions describe the end of the world, and that people who believe blindly in these religions feel this is an inevitability. What Maher points out is, yes, the end of the world could be inevitable, but not because God wills it, because we humans will it. Steel Dawn is one of many post-apocalyptic films made in the 80s where the end of the world as we knew it came about as a result of nuclear war, which would play into Maher's point. It also plays into the point he was making by showing that we humans are somehow fascinated with the concept of the world ceasing to exist. The problem is, the movies focus on the survivors-- obviously because there'd be no movie otherwise-- and people forget that if a catastrophe struck, odds are good that they'd die a horrible death. Because of the influence of their faith, they somehow feel their devotion will make them "chosen" and protected, which is a scary concept. It means they aren't thinking rationally about what the end of the world could mean.



I really liked this image above. It's not often that I watch a low-budget film and see a screenshot that's that great. If it were in a film with a much more acclaimed director, people would be all over how amazing it was and how it was just more proof of how great the director is. Well, Steel Dawn's director was Lance Hool, and his other two directing credits were Missing in Action 2, and One Man's Hero. Here's to you, Lance Hool, that was a great shot. (Of course, I probably should be lauding the exploits of the film's cinematographer, George Tirl. His other work includes Left Behind and a bunch of other Christian Armageddon movies--- go figure.)

While this is on Hulu, you need to see it. It'll be your best and cheapest way. Sure, you gotta put up with obnoxious 5-Hour Energy commercials every so often, but it's still free. Anyway, it's worth it.

For more info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0094033/

Black Dog (1998)

Initially I was going to end my week long tribute to Patrick Swayze with the post apocalyptic sci-fi goof fest Steel Dawn. I just figured it would be the most fitting for that to end a DTVC tribute. My plan was to then throw Black Dog in as a bonus for one of my readers, RepoGenetic, who requested it. Unfortunately, Netflix wasn't able to give me Steel Dawn, so Black Dog is stepping in as the fourth post. I look at it as Steel Dawn was our keynote speaker for our symposium on Swayze, but since he couldn't make it due to inclement weather, Black Dog, who was only supposed to give a small talk, now has to pinch hit and give the speech, and we'll just have Steel Dawn back to talk at another time.

Black Dog has Swayze as a former rig driver that's just been released from prison after serving time for vehicular manslaughter. His first job while on parole is as a truck mechanic, and his bad guy boss decides he might serve him better by driving a load from Georgia up to New Jersey, where they live. Swayze wants to say no, but when he finds out their house is in foreclosure, he knows he needs the money. That's when things go crazy. The guy he gets the load from in Georgia, Meat Loaf, wants to hijack the cargo, and the FBI is after it, but he can't give up, because if he does, his wife and daughter will be killed by his boss in New Jersey. The only thing to do: go Swayze on their asses.



This is a great movie. If we couldn't have Steel Dawn, we definitely made out fine with Black Dog. The best way to describe it is that feeling a three-year-old has when he sees a big rig on the highway, and gets him to pull his horn. You know, like when we were all young, and we were so excited to see inside a big rig, because it was so cool and big. This movie is like that, but made for us adults. Just a bunch of big rigs crashing and exploding all over the place. And Swayze. Don't forget Swayze. Just an all around fun time.

It's hard to find the perfect four movies to really celebrate a career as big as Swayze's, but I think we did a pretty good job. There were some others that could've been included: Dirty Dancing, Ghost, Too Wong Foo..., and Waking up in Reno were all indicative of his range, but probably not appropriate for what the DTVC is all about. Next of Kin was another suggestion, and though I haven't seen that in forever, I think that fits in right behind Black Dog. I also think Steel Dawn and Next of Kin could have been reviewed on their own, outside of a Swayze tribute, because they pretty much are DTV, in the sense that an American Ninja is. There's also his great supporting role in Donnie Darko, but I felt to really do a Swayze week justice, they had to all be movies that he was on the cover of.



So we started with Road House, probably his best work in the action genre, and maybe some of the best work of all time. From there we only took a step down one rung of the ladder to Point Break. Then we went to the classically bad Red Dawn. Anything after those three was going to be a drop off in terms of memorability and iconic status, but I think ending with Black Dog, we at least were able to showcase a role that's indicative of what we expect out of Swayze the action star. He has this larger than life quality packaged as a regular guy. Even Bodhi has a way of coming off as down-to-Earth while he's preaching to us his Zen philosophy that even he doesn't really believe in. We know the moment we hop in that rig with Swayze, that he's going to take care of business, no matter what.

Let's just talk about the movie itself quickly. Randy Travis was great. This is the second film of his we've done, and he's been great in both. Gotta love Charles S. Dutton as the FBI agent too. Meat Loaf is a different story. I don't understand why anyone would have him in a movie. He can't act. He always overdoes it, which I guess works when you're writing 11-minute songs with paragraph long titles, but in an action film, it's a little too much. I was kind of annoyed that he reinserted himself at the end of the film, because it would've been better if he'd just disappeared. I was more excited to see a Waffle House in one scene than I ever was to see the Loaf.



Looking at Swayze's imdb resume, this is the last role he had as the lead in an action film, so maybe it is more fitting that this would be the last in the four films we covered this week. It's probably the simplest in scope, but no less fun. Sure, I loved the idea of doing Steel Dawn as the last one, just because it is a DTV movie, but as I was watching exploding rig after exploding rig in Black Dog, I understood that it all worked out. Black Dog was the perfect fourth film.

As I said above, this won't be the end of Swayze's time at the DTVC, because eventually I will review Steel Dawn, and there's also Next of Kin. Just the same, I had fun this week going outside the usual realm of DTV films into some more mainstream pictures (if you can consider Road House mainstream!), and I'm glad we could celebrate in this small way what made Patrick Swayze so great to all of us. It's hard to think that we won't have any new movies from him again, but at least we'll always have the great ones he already made for us.

For more info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0120610/

Red Dawn (1984)

This is probably, of the Swayze threesome, the hardest for me to stomach. Even when I was ten, and I first saw it on VHS, I was like "this is ridiculously stupid." Ten-year-olds shouldn't have a better a understanding of international relations theory, script and story writing, and the realities of surviving a brutal winter in the American Rockies than adults who have union cards to the screenwriters' and directors' guilds.

Red Dawn takes place in the early 80s. The USSR is strapped for resources, so they invade the United States with the help of Cuba and Nicaragua. Europe is run by liberal governments, so they want no part of coming to the US's aid, and for whatever reason NATO no longer exists. The Soviets, perhaps because they got an erroneously marked map, invaded a small town in the northern Rockies and take it over. Some high school kids escape and hide out in the woods. They stockpile arms and form an insurgent group that they name the Wolverines. They give the Soviet occupiers a hard time, much the way Hezbollah did to the Israelis. Eventually, the Soviets prevail, but the Wolverines' fight inspires all Americans to stand up to the Godless commies.



Let's forget about the Right Wing propaganda and the silliness of some of the leaps of faith in IR theory and US military defense they want us to make. Someone on imdb tried to make the case that this was well made, and that we focus too much on the other two factors, and miss the quality of the cinema. The dude even had the audacity to evoke Arthur Koestler's amazing novel Darkness at Noon. Okay, give me a second to regain my bearings. This guy watched the Jennifer Grey death scene-- "I'm so cold... just give me a grenade... pull the pin... I'm so cold...", to which a sobbing Swayze hands her the grenade-- and he thought that was quality cinema? He brought up the imagery in the occupied small town. What, a paltry copy of Doctor Zhivago? What about all the dialog that sounded like a series of non sequiturs? Chronicles of Riddick had a better script. And how do you explain the month of October that was 230 days long? That's the only way to explain how these high school kids have the ability to dig four deep holes in the ground, four hatches to cover them seamlessly, and then plan an ambush on a Soviet convoy stopping at a roadside gas station. This was not well made or artistically done.

The fact that this was poorly made made it funny, though. It's funny to watch it with friends, and when someone says something that makes no sense given the context, to say "Um... I think you missed a line." Also funny were the leaps of faith in what is possible as far as an invasion of the US. No National Guard, no NATO, no nuclear capability ("we wouldn't use them on ourselves" Powers Boothe explains. No shit, Sherlock! We'd use them on the Soviets. Moscow would be a parking lot if they invaded us!). That's what it would take for us to have a small town in the northwest Rockies invaded and occupied, and they gave paltry explanations for why there's no NATO or nukes, and no explanation for why there's no National Guard. There's a reason why we aren't invaded: countries like the USSR are afraid of us. And the logistics based on out terrain and location are absurd. Our military is huge, are nukes are nasty, and our resources and terrain work in our favor. The fact that none of that was considered is insane.



I promised some of my friends I wouldn't make this about the Right Wing Propaganda aspect, so I'm only devoting one paragraph to it. This movie is pretty much made for the people who go to Obama public appearances packing heat. There's a reason why we're invaded by Commies and Latinos. Fear of Godless Socialists and illegal immigrants. There's a reason why the people in town with guns are rounded up. Just look at the scene when Charlie Sheen asks Swayze what makes the Wolverines different from the Soviets, to which Swayze replies "Because we live here!" It sums up the sentiment of the film. Everything is being taken away by outsiders. Probably most indicative of the conservative sentiment is the idea that October is 230 days long. They would probably think if they extended the month, the weather they like at that time of year would be extended too. In the spirit of fairness, if liberals had control of the calendar, they'd make October 30 days instead of 31 so it wouldn't have more than any other month. I want to make clear that if this was a liberal propaganda fest, I'd feel the same way about it.

Swayze isn't able to save this film. It lacks the fun factor of Road House and Point Break. He's swept under the current of ridiculosity (I know it's not a word, but what better way to describe the movie). What's ironic is if the makers of this film had the America they wanted, you'd get the small Missouri town run by Garrett that Swayze has to save. I don't know how to explain it, but in Road House and Point Break he transcends the silliness, while here, he's enveloped by it. Just the same, I included this because people in the bad action community (including myself) see it as a classically bad movie. When you think Swayze, you think Road House, Point Break, and Red Dawn. Despite the annoying Right Wing propaganda, I still have a fun time with my buddies watching this and making fun of it.



Ron O'Neal turns in one of the few bright performances. It's a sad fact that this film boasts now two victims of pancreatic cancer, with O'Neal passing away from the horrible disease five years ago. I looked him up on imdb, because I've always wondered why he was associated with this sack of asscrack. Turns out he was never offered that many roles after Super Fly. That's too bad, because as an actor he had a solid pedigree, and he deserved better roles than a Nicaraguan officer in the ludicrously conceived invasion of the US.

This is a movie that, when I watch alone, I find myself at times laughing out loud, at others shaking my head, and at others being so bored I'm doing something else. With friends, it's transformed into a hilarious jokefest. There are moments when there's too much material, and my brain's overloaded with what to make fun of next. It's a little too pretentious and self-righteous to be as much fun as Road House and Point Break, but it's so silly that it's worth watching and mocking.

For more info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0087985/

Point Break (1991)

When thinking of what four films to post for a Patrick Swayze week, first Road House came to mind, and then Point Break. It's just another Swayze classic. Plus, this one has a DTVC Hall of Famer in Gary Busey. I also think, and I'll have to check on this, that this is first film I've featured with a woman director-- not only that, but a director who was on the jury of the Berlin and Venice film festivals.

Point Break has Keanu Reeves as a former college football player, Johnny Utah, who is an FBI agent just out of the academy. He pairs up with Gary Busey to investigate a series of bank robberies by some dudes in US President masks. At the same time, while going undercover to catch them, Reeves meets Swayze and his gang of surfers. They become friends. But things are going on with Swayze, and Reeves gets suspicious. As the evidence points to Swayze, Reeves has to figure out if he's too far gone to arrest him.



All right, I'm going to come clean here. I don't just like this movie, I actually think it's good. Like good, good. I know, I know, Keanu Reeves goes to law school on a football scholarship. I know, I know, Vincent Klyn's character is named Warchild. I know, there's the overly dramatic scene when Reeves sees Swayze's eyes through the Reagan mask and discharges his gun in the air whilst yelling in pain. I know all this, and I'm not sure exactly what I can point to and say "that's quality"-- but for whatever reason, it just is to me. Maybe I'm just crazy.

Swayze's character is named Bodhi. He's pretty much full of shit, and you get the sense that if Swayze ever met Bodhi in real life, he'd see through his bullshit. So would legendary bouncer Dalton. I think it just speaks to Swayze's range. Bodi and Dalton are both Swayze, and he pulls them both off, but they're so different. Very few actors can be such convincing heroes and baddies, and I think the only reason why Swayze never received more credit for his ability to do so was that Road House and Point Break were considered such cheesefests.



I've never reviewed a Keanu Reeves film on here, so this gives me a unique opportunity to discuss an actor whose films are usually outside my pay grade. In 1991, Reeves was two years removed from Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, which made him one of the biggest things in Hollywood at that time. As the nineties moved on, he did more Johnny Mnemonics and Speeds and Chain Reactions, and that star faded. Now, ten years after the first Matrix, Reeves is again making big time box office blockbusters like The Day the Earth Stopped. I guess my question is, why was there ever an up and down? Do you see any difference in the Special Agent Johnny Utah now and then? I liked him in this, My Own Private Idaho, and Dangerous Liaisons. I didn't get him in the Matrix Trilogy. The whole Utah as Neo thing was weird. If anything, Paul Walker should be wondering why it didn't work as well for him.

Speaking of Walker, we all know The Fast and the Furious was a remake of Point Break. When I was in college in 2002, as a senior, some freshmen were watching The Fast and the Furious, and they didn't know what I was talking about when I told them it was a remake. "What's Point Break?" Amazing that in only ten years someone can repackage a basic paradigm and release it to a new group of kids who have no idea that it ripped off another movie that was made when they were 8. The one thing that The Fast and the Furious lacked that Point Break had (other than Swayze and Busey), was Kathryn Bigelow's artistic direction. The script of Point Break may have been cheesy, but it had the best foot chase in the history of film, among other great scenes. Also, I wonder if Bigelow, being a women, dialed down the tool factor considerably, which was a major sticking point in The Fast and the Furious.



In 1991, I never considered the ramifications of having Tom Seizemore and Gary Busey in the same film. The volume of drug use must have been astounding. Swayze doesn't have any scenes with Seizemore, which is a disappointment. I'd love to have seen Swayze as Bodhi trying to make sense of Seizemore (in a moment that was probably art imitating life) pouring beer over his cereal. I actually tried that myself once. Disgusting. Busey is pure Busey as Reeves' partner. This role is what the Abusive scale was made from-- it is the control, the basis upon which every other Busey role is measured.

Any Swayze fest should include this classic. With Kathryn Bigelow's The Hurt Locker gaining buzz in theaters, Point Break is being recognized again for entirely different reasons. Whether you like it for Swayze, Bigelow, or both, this is a must for any collection.

For more info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0102685/

Road House (1989)

This is one of my all time favorite movies, and I was considering posting it for a milestone, like 500, but circumstances have changed. It's unfortunate that Patrick Swayze's death is the reason I'm reviewing his movies this week, but I'm glad we can at least celebrate what made him so awesome.

Road House has Swayze as a legendary bouncer named Dalton, called into action in Missouri by Kevin Tighe to run his bar, the Double Deuce. Little does Dalton know that the town is under the thumb of a corrupt businessman played by Ben Gazzara. Now it's up to this legendary bouncer to clean up the bar, fight the corruption, and find love in a small town.

What else do I need to say? This movie has it all. Great one-liners: "Pain don't hurt." Well, by it's very definition, it has to, or it wouldn't be pain. Monster trucks crashing through used car dealerships. Notes pinned to dead people with knives. Office malls doubling as hospitals. Women with big hair showing us their breasts. Marshall Teague telling Swayze he fucked guys like him in prison, to which Swayze responds by ripping his throat out. Oh yeah, and Sam Elliott as yet another legendary bouncer.

I can't tell you enough how much I love this movie. I don't think I've ever watched it with people and not had everyone in the room entertained. It starts good, and it never lets up. As an action film, it's an icon in the industry. Mike Nelson describes the "Road House-ian standard" by which he compares all other action films in his book Movie Megacheese. He also does a great Rifftrax of it, which you should check out. MST3K, in Santa Claus Conquers the Martians, gave us the "Patrick Swayze Christmas" carol. GQ had it as the number one bad movie of all time, which I think is a compliment. There was even an off-Broadway musical made about it. Say Road House, and people know exactly what you're talking about.

I'm not really sure what Swayze thought when he first received the script. "You'll be playing a legendary bouncer." Can you imagine anyone else in that role? The whole thing just seems to be sui generis: if you're going to make a movie about a legendary bouncer, Patrick Swayze should be it. Does he make the part believable? In a way, yes. I mean, let's get down to brass tacks, a legendary bouncer is about as realistic as a man born in 1840 in the anachronistically named Northwest Territory with the ability to heal himself, shoot claws from his knuckles, and smell really well, who then has his skeleton covered in an indestructible metal. We buy Hugh Jackman as Wolverine, and I think we buy Swayze as Dalton, the legendary bouncer with a PhD in Philosophy from NYU even more. This is what made Swayze great. Road House wouldn't be Road House with any other actor in the lead.

As a self-proclaimed connoisseur of these types of movies, I've noticed a trend in some to take a tongue-in-cheek approach to the material. I have a feeling if this was made today, that would've happened here too, and the result would've sucked ass. Swayze had to know how ridiculous this was, yet at the same time, if he did, he never let us know it. He acted the hell out of this silly material. As did everyone else. When Sam Elliott shows up, it makes complete sense to all involved that we have yet another legendary bouncer. The film exists in this liminal space where legendary bouncers are common place--they have a sort of celebrity akin to a movie star or a House Minority Whip. Had this world been treated as a joke by the cast, we as the audience wouldn't have enjoyed it as much.

People ask me about Road House 2 all the time, and I feel like I taint this post just a bit by mentioning it. The truth is, that sack-of-asscrack was simply a cash grab trading on the good name of the original. You'll notice Swayze isn't involved in it. Now that Swayze is no longer with us, I feel like that's it for Road House. If there was ever going to be a sequel, a real one that is, it would've needed Swayze reprising his role as Dalton, the legendary bouncer. To be frank, though, I really don't think we ever needed a sequel. If ever a movie stood alone, this was it. The problem with Hollywood is they force a sequel out of a great storyline that was fine where it ended. How many great sequels can you think of? Godfather II, Empire Strikes Back, House Party 2, Back to the Future 2, and Last Crusade (Temple of Doom wasn't a good sequel) come to mind, but that's it. Maybe Terminator 2 as well. I think one Road House was plenty.

I can't imagine anyone reading this blog hasn't seen Road House. I would suggest getting together with a bunch of friends and viewing it again, though. You may or may not want to go the Mike Nelson Rifftrax route. It's really funny, and I think it only costs $1.99 to download, but I'm sure you and your friends already have your own set of jokes and comments associated with the movie, so you may not want someone else's commentary. Either way, Road House truly is the standard by which all other action films are compared.

For more info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0098206/

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