The Direct to Video Connoisseur

I'm a huge fan of action, horror, sci-fi, and comedy, especially of the Direct to Video variety. In this blog I review some of my favorites and not so favorites, and encourage people to comment and add to the discussion. If you click on an image, it will take you to that post's image page, which includes many more pics from the film and other goodies I couldn't fit in the actual review. For announcements and updates, don't forget to Follow us on Twitter and Like our Facebook page. If you're the director, producer, distributor, etc. of a low-budget feature length film and you'd like to send me a copy to review, you can contact me at dtvconnoisseur[at]yahoo.com. I'd love to check out what you got.

Announcement

Announcement

Hi everyone, it's been a while since I checked the page, and I wanted to make a few announcements.

First and foremost, it appears a dubious site has claimed the old url, meaning any link in any review that goes to the old mattmovieguy url is corrupt. I'm in the process of trying to remove them all, but it's a lot! It's best not to click on any link without hovering over it first to make sure it doesn't have mattmovieguy in the url.

Second, it appears since my last trip to the blog, Photobucket has decided to charge for third party hosting, meaning none of my images are appearing anymore. That's simply an aesthetic issue, but still annoying.

Thank you all for your patience, and again, hopefully this will all be fixed soon.

--Matt

Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Far Cry (2008)

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Just released on DVD here in the States last week, I had to wait until this week to review Far Cry due to our Golan-Globus celebration. Uwe Boll's newest movie, it was ins Kino over in Germany, but never made it to theaters over here. Probably something to do with that lack of German tax relief giving him less money to throw at Hollywood celebrities.

Far Cry stars German actor Til Schweiger as a former German special forces dude working a charter boat off the coast of Washington for whale watchers. Then an amazingly hot reporter hires him to take her to an island where her uncle, Rolf Moeller, has reported an evil scientist, Udo Kier, has been conducting experiments on soldiers to make the perfect killing machine. Til isn't so hot about this idea, and he drops her off, planning to just wait at the boat until she's done. Unfortunately, guys with special forces training don't just get to wash their hands of the action, especially when they're top billed in an action film, and Til's boat is hit by a rocket and he narrowly escapes death. The rest of the film is him trying to get off the island, but the reporter being so hot that he can't convince her to leave well enough alone, so because of her, he has to take down Kier.

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This isn't bad. Okay, it was, but in a very fun way. Rolf Moeller was great, almost as good as he was in Best of the Best 2. Til Schweiger was a cool good guy, and the reporter, played by Emmanuelle Vaugier, was plenty hot enough as the female lead. The action was nice and steady, though at times went on a little too long and was repetitive. It had plenty of the silliness we've grown to expect from Boll, including the engineered soldiers having bulletproof skin that could only be killed by a shot to the eye, but administering them injections through that same skin was no problem.

There were some pretty annoying things, though. Not only was the action at times long winded and repetitive, but the fights had that Bourne Identity element of too much jumpiness, which is hard to watch. Then there were scenes with bit actors where these jokes would go on way past their usefulness. Even worse, the annoying fat guy from BloodRayne II was in this, only he was even more fat annoying that he was before. I've never understood why director's like fat annoying guys. I've never been a fan of them. Also, Michael Paré is in it for five minutes as Vaugier's boss. Come on, less annoying fat guy, more, Paré.

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I was under the impression that Til Schweiger was a legitimate action star in Germany, but now I'm not so sure. Based on his imdb bio, he's done some other action films, but he's also done romantic comedies and dramas too. Also, according to that bio, he turned down the role in Saving Private Ryan as the soldier that kills Tom Hanks, because he didn't know how American audiences would react to that. Well, they reacted to him not being in it by not knowing who the hell he is. It's better to be known as the Nazi who killed Tom Hanks, than to not be known at all, that's what I always say.

Another complaint was the lack of German spoken in this movie. Between Rolf Moeller, Udo Kier, and Til Schweiger, these guys should've been carrying on segments of dialog ins Deutsch. The only thing we got was Tischtennis. Are you kidding me. Hat man wohl ins gehirn geschissen und vergessen umzuruhren? (Did someone shit in your head and forget to stir?)

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Not German but just as hot was Emannuelle Vaugier. If they needed a German they could've settled on Eva Habermann, but I'm glad went with who they did. According to imdb she's had reoccurring roles on Two and a Half Men and CSI: NY. She also played Painkiller Jane in the original TV movie, which is interesting, because the chick who we tag as Painkiller Jane at the DTVC is a Uwe Boll mainstay.

Before I go, I must confess that though Anthony Bourdain is listed in the credits, I couldn't remember seeing him in the movie. That might be as good a reason as any to check this out: to see where the eff Bourdain is. It's currently on Netflix's Watch Instantly, so if you have that, it'll only be an investment in your time, which isn't bad. Probably a better film to watch in a group than by yourself, in order to have people to laugh about it with.

For more info: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0400426/

2 comments:

  1. Saw this last week on Instant Watch- me and the person I watched it with laughed ourselves silly.

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  2. Exactly, the whole movie was comic relief, meaning we didn't need the annoying fat guy.

    ReplyDelete