Contract to Kill (2016)

This is one I was trying to watch for a long time--in fact it was the second-to-last Seagal film I needed to see, the last one is now End of a Gun. It came up for free on Xumo, so I jumped at it and made it happen. In addition to us, our friend Mitch at the Video Vacuum has covered this too, so you can go to his site to see what he thought. Now, without any further ado.

Contract to Kill--not to be confused with any of Seagal's other to Kill movies--has Seagal as a former secret service assassin--not to be confused with the other films where he plays a former secret service agent--who's called back to duty for one last job--not to be confused with the other films where he's a former agent called back into duty for one last job--that involves him forming a team that does most of the heavy lifting and allows him to sit most of the time--not to be confused with the other films where he forms a team that does all the heavy lifting and allows him to sit most of the time. As luck would have it, he and his team find out they're pawns in a government game--not to be confused with the other times... okay, you get the idea. This is your standard Seagal/Waxman get Seagal some money 2010s DTV actioner.

 

And that's what we've got here, standard DTV fare from Seagal, especially when it's directed by Waxman. Seagal has his trademark chia fuzz goatee and widow's peak hair; he sits more than he stands; he does some slap-chop fights where the other guy can't possibly get a hit in; and his co-stars do more of the heavy lifting. The thing is, these movies have kind of got me. They're fun in spite of themselves. It's not like a bag of Doritos, where I know where the goodness is, and I know I'll be paying for it later if I finish the whole family size bag; these are more like the Wise rip-off Bravos, where I see them on sale, eat them, realize they're not as good as I remember, but their rip-off-ness kind of grows on me, and I like the idea of spending less to eat something not as good. Does any of that make sense? Maybe I out-metaphored myself.

We're nearing the finish line of Seagal's DTV films. By my count we have five left after this--six if I do Clementine, which I may do because it'll be the one that puts him in the 40 Club. The other thing is, with the slow pace at which I'm putting out reviews, he may get some new films out by the time we're finished, meaning we'll have to do those as well. Seagal is going to be 70 next year--which is interesting, because when we started the site his IMDb listed him as born in 1951, so somehow became a year younger since 2007. I used to go by what I called the Death Wish V Standard for action stars, meaning Charles Bronson was 73 when that came out, so that's the oldest for an action lead. Seagal is closing in on that number, and I feel like if he gets more sit-down roles with Waxman at the helm, he could surge past Bronson's Death Wish V age. I never considered it before, but killing someone with a remote control soccer ball is perfect for a sit-down role--and to some extent this movie sets us up to go there, using drones to do a lot of the work for Seagal instead.

This is Keoni Waxman's ninth film here on the site. That doesn't sound like a lot, but for a director that's a pretty big number. To give you a sense, he's one behind DTVC Hall of Famer Cirio H. Santiago. Does that mean Waxman could someday make his own way into the Hall of Fame? I think it's a real possibility. From a numbers standpoint, I think Isaac Florentine and Sam Firstenberg would need to get in before him, and Jesse V. Johnson is right with Waxman as another director who needs consideration; but Waxman's work as the Seagal whisperer alone is Hall of Fame worthy. Between '09 and '17, the only film he did that wasn't a Seagal film was Hunt to Kill. He also did the The Anna Nicole Smith Story, the one that starred Willa Ford as Anna Nicole Smith. That might be an interesting non-Seagal Waxman to check out.

One of Seagal's costars in this is the always great Russell Wong. I saw on his IMDb bio that he's in the new Clifford live-action film that's opening in theaters this weekend. I wonder who's tougher to work with, Seagal or a big CGI red dog? Wong plays the drone guy, so he does a great job allowing Seagal to spend more time sitting. Again, I wonder who sits more, Seagal in this film, or the big CGI red dog? It's a unique situation, because we're used to guys like Byron Mann or Bren Foster who do the heavy lifting in more martial arts scenes, but Wong is doing it with a remote control. Either way, whatever allows Seagal to do the least amount of work, the better.

 

Speaking of which, look at that screen above, which comes from an extended slow chase where all Seagal does is sit behind a steering wheel and pretend to drive. It's amazing stuff. Seagal also does a fight scene sitting, but this takes the cake for me. With Waxman coming up with new and creative ways to give Seagal action scenes while he's sitting, this shows the lengths of his ingenuity. Hall of Fame nominations are coming in October, and it feels like Waxman is really making a push. If not this year, maybe next year? Especially if more of his Seagal films have gems like this.

And with that, I think we're done. That was quick, right? I feel like I was just starting this review, and suddenly we're on the 8th paragraph. This is now available on Tubi, which makes it a much better option. If you like a good ol' Seagal/Waxman 2010s DTV "actioner," this will do the trick. If you don't, then even for free on Tubi it's a pass.

For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt5470222

And if you haven't yet, check out my new novel, A Girl and a Gun, at Amazon in paperback or Kindle!

 

The Intergalactic Adventures of Max Cloud aka Max Cloud (2020)

I caught this when it was available on Hoopla, which I thought was a big deal, since it didn't seem like it was available for free anywhere else. Now that I've finally gotten around to covering it, it's available on Prime too. Either way, it's more Adkins, and we have a lot to catch up on with him. In addition to us, our friends at Bulletproof Action have covered this too, so you can go there to see what they thought. Now without any further ado.

Max Cloud has Scott Adkins as the eponymous hero of a video game that a girl, Sarah, living in Brooklyn in the early 90s, loves playing. As luck would have it, she gets transported into the game, and the only way out is for her friend Cowboy, who has a penchant for eating "tinned" sausage, to beat the game. That's not going to be easy, because the characters are stuck on a prison planet, with baddies aplenty and danger all around--a lot of places where a character can get themselves killed. Will Cowboy do it and get Sarah out of the game before she dies--and more importantly, before her dad wonders where she is?

The  problem with this one, at least for me, is we've been here before, and I don't know what this film is doing that's new on that score beyond giving us a female video game playing protagonist--which I agree shouldn't be understated, as the stereotype is only boys play video games. The thing is, for me it needs to be more than that. It had some nice callbacks to the games I enjoyed from the early 90s, which was a nice touch, but again, nice touches need to be accoutrements to a solid greater whole, and this just wasn't quite there. There was some good Adkins, as he played a goofier kind of hero, almost Inspector Gadget, only instead of gadgets he had his martial arts ability. The sets were nice too, there was a great supporting cast, and I liked the way the shots of the video game on the TV looked like a 90s sidescroller I would've played; but ultimately, I felt like we were left with a concept that's been done many times before, and the film's nice touches couldn't get it past that for me.

We last saw Adkins here when we did Accident Man in March, and I think in that time he's released three more movies. I'm kidding, but it's still believable with him and his output. This is one of five films he had come out in 2020, which is following four each for 2019 and 2018. Of those 13, I've seen 8, and now have reviewed six, so we have a lot to catch up on, and with the rate at which I'm watching films and doing reviews, he might as well be Eric Roberts, I'll probably never get there with him. The thing about this one is, when I saw it being mentioned, I thought it looked fantastic--the problem was, I didn't know it was going the "player transported into her video game route." I do like though that Adkins is showing us his range here, and maybe in the future, we can get more fun, wisecracking heroes from him who also kick a lot of buttocks.

 

As always, whenever I have bones to pick with the film I'm reviewing, I try to be solutions oriented, so that leads us to what I would have done differently. I think the first thing I would have done is stopped at "kid transported into her video game." Whether it's transported into movies, TV shows, or video games, we've seen it, and I think it takes a lot to take that idea and do something new with it. With that in mind, I think you just scrap the transported into the video game part, and keep the rest. Adkins as the Inspector Gadget-type goofy hero, Sally Collet and Elliot James Landridge as the people left on his crew trying to help him, and the rest of the story of them trying to fix the ship and get off the prison planet is the same. The transported into and stuck in the video game part I think bogged the film down in a way that it didn't need, and also took the elements that were inventive and made it less so.

This film had a great cast, and two great parts beyond the ones I've already mentioned, were Tommy Flanagan as the mysterious intergalactic bounty hunter Brock Donnelly; and John Hannah as the evil villain Revengnor. The problem with both I think is that, with this added intrigue of Sarah trying to get her friend to get her out of the video game, neither Flanagan or Donnely's characters are really developed well, and we kind of lose them for parts of the film. On the one hand it's good, because both do their jobs so well that we don't need a lot of development for them, but on the other, there was a sense that we weren't getting enough of them. Either way, they were a welcome site and fun to have here.

 

Finally, no post like this would be complete without my own memories of early 90s video game playing. The thing about sidescrollers is they were good on my own, or if only one buddy was coming for a sleepover, but in bigger groups, the fighting games that were becoming popular at that time were a much better bet. Winner stays, loser gives up the controller. My wife and I got one of those new Super Nintendo machines that has a bunch of games pre-loaded in it, and we were playing a lot of Super Mario World, until we weren't. I think we got it like two years ago, and it just sits now. Not that I don't play video games, I have some on my phone, but this movie did bring back some of the nostalgia of loading up on junk food and having a friend over to try to beat a certain game; or just playing myself and trying to pass a certain point or gain another accomplishment. Again, ultimately more accoutrements accompanying an overall idea we've seen before.

And with that, let's wrap this up. This is now available on Prime, and if you have Prime, streaming it without paying extra may be the way to go. It has a lot to like, the problem for me was, I've been there and done that with the whole transported into whatever medium I'm consuming, and I think that hurt the film overall.

For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt9472532

And if you haven't yet, check out my novel Chad in Accounting at Amazon in paperback or Kindle!

Female Fight Club (2016)

This film is a milestone on here for two reasons. One, it officially marks Dolph's entry into the 60 Club. I don't know if I'll create any imaging for that until Gary Daniels finally joins him in a year or two, but we'll see; and two, this is the last DTV film of Dolph's I needed to see, and now I've seen them all. (There are three more Dolph's I need to see though: Small Apartments, Fat Slags, and Electric Boogaloo.)

Female Fight Club has Amy Johnston as a woman working at an animal shelter in Vegas who has a past... turns out she was once an underground pit fighter, but she quit after her sister (Tracy Palm) was assaulted by someone and her father (Dolph Lundgren) killed that someone. The sister is also a fighter, and she has a daughter of her own to support. When she gets in big to a crime boss running an underground fight ring, she enlists her sister to help train some female fighters she's been working with, so they can win a tournament and she can make good with the crime boss. But, as we know in movies like this, pasts don't go away that easily, and who's casting Amy Johnston in a movie like this if she isn't going to fight eventually?

 

This wasn't horrible, but it does miss a few marks. First and foremost, there isn't much of a female fight club. Johnston trains them for a second, then a few scenes later they get beaten in the tournament, and that's the end of it. Also, not to give it away, but they kill off a character that they didn't need to kill off, as it doesn't advance the plot in any way, so it just felt like they were trying to be dark to be dark, or dramatic to be dramatic. On the other hand, there are some good fights in this, in particular a nice Dolph one just so we feel like we got our money's worth out of seeing his name on the tin, and Johnston feels like someone who could be in that next generation of DTV action stars if she gets the right vehicles. Maybe this isn't the right vehicle for her, but she at least showed she could handle something better. Overall, this isn't the worst thing to watch if you find it on your streaming package.

60 movies for the great Dolph Lundgren, the Babe Ruth of DTV. I finally made a trip up to see a game at Yankee Stadium a couple weeks ago, and made sure I got my pics of the Babe Ruth's granite monument and retired number at Monument Park, and his jerseys in the Yankees Museum; and my grandfather actually saw Ruth play in his 1935 season with the Boston Braves. The point I'm getting to is, maybe I'm pumping Dolph up too much by comparing him to perhaps the greatest player in baseball history, but everyone knows I love baseball analogies, and who else would Dolph be if not Babe Ruth? And 60's a big number for Ruth, as that was the single-season home run record he held until Maris broke it with 61--and we even have our asterisk, because technically Dolph has been tagged 61 times, but we don't count the time he was tagged for the Van Damme Film Fest post. There's never been a DTV star who's moved the needle the way Dolph has--maybe Seagal, but he doesn't have as many DTV films. By my count, we have six or seven Dolph's left to review, plus he has some in post-production that haven't been released yet, so the 70 Club isn't that far fetched. If it's a Dolph movie, we'll be there.

 

This is definitely more an Amy Johnston movie than a Dolph movie, and while Dolph is the reason we're here, Johnston is developing a name where she can be the main draw without a Dolph alongside. I also liked that Dolph in this, like he did with Natalie Burn in Acceleration, and Denise Richards in Altitude, took a step back to let a woman making a name for herself in DTV action have the spotlight. The thing is, this movie couldn't tell if it wanted to be a dramatic, suspenseful slow-burner, or an action-packed punchfighter, and for someone like Johnston who's making a name for herself, that doesn't help. I think she needs a full-on, 85-minute, Adkins-style actioner where her character is allowed to just get after it. Maybe a Debt Collector sequel where it's her and Natalie Burn beating up guys and collecting debts. Speaking of Adkins, we've seen her once before in Accident Man, and she was great there in a smaller supporting part; but looking at her IMDb bio, I don't see much more of her stuff for us to do, beyond Lady Bloodfight and Breaking Barbi. Hopefully this is just the start of a big DTV career for her.

As I mentioned above, there isn't much of a Female Fight Club in this film, which isn't good since that's the name of the movie. It ended up feeling like an underdeveloped aspect, but by the same token, the women in the female fight club weren't as compelling Johnston's character, so I get why they weren't developed further. It makes the movie feel uneven though, to have this whole thing of her training fighters midway through the movie, and then it's abandoned. This ends up feeling like the issue we've been seeing with a lot of DTV movies lately: they have enough material for an episode of a syndicated action show, but not enough to fill a 90-minute movie. I don't know why this problem has become so prevalent, but it feels like something that we've been seeing a lot of since 2011. Is it because there is no more syndicated action TV for screenwriters to get work on, so they're just taking scripts they would have written for that and adding 45 minutes of pages? Maybe the number of streaming services looking for content could be a new avenue for syndicated TV--I saw that there's a From Dusk Til Dawn TV show that probably would have been a syndicated TV show in the 90s. Hopefully that kind of thing will fill the gap, and eventually our DTV movies will start to feel like movies again, and not TV show episodes with a bunch of fluff tacked on.

 

Finally, I feel like Dolph's 60th film on the site deserves another paragraph, so here we are. Dolph is about five or six years older than Mark Dacascos, but the point is the same that, like Dacascos did in One Night in Bangkok, he's leaning into playing an older part here, which is refreshing. He's not playing someone older than himself the way Dacascos did, but he is playing someone his age, who has two grown daughters, one of whom has a daughter of her own, making his character a grandfather. We have a whole collection of films available on Tubi and other streaming services where we can revisit Dolph's career when he was younger if we really need that. There are also some films we haven't reviewed yet where he plays someone younger--or gets the younger female costar--and I think we'll be able to go back to this one when we look at those and say, this is a much better way to do it. With Dolph and Van Damme in their 60s, and Seagal approaching 70, we're seeing a new age with action stars staying relevant longer, and I think how they play these parts is uncharted territory that DTV filmmakers are going to have to navigate, along with the stars themselves in how their characters are portrayed. Doing it this way, where Dolph is playing someone his own age and isn't as much in the spotlight so a new star like Johnston can shine, is one avenue that I think can really work.

And with that, let's wrap this up. As of right now, I don't think this is available on any of the main streaming platforms--IMDb lists it as on the Tribeca Shortlist Prime Channel, but the best I can tell it's a $4 streaming rental here in the States. For my money, it's not worth that--I was able to get it as part of another streaming service's free preview week through our cable provider, and if you get an opportunity like that, I'd say it's worth checking out.

For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt5153860/

And if you haven't yet, check out my novel, Chad in Accounting, in paperback or on Kindle!

One Night in Bangkok (2020)

I saw this was available on HBO Max, and with us needing to get more from newly inducted Hall of Famer Mark Dacascos on the site, it seemed like a perfect match. By the same token, every time I see the title, I get the Murray Head song of the same name stuck in my dome. I haven't had it this bad since Mike Nelson sang the chorus while he and the 'bots were riffing on Alien from LA. Anyway, in addition to us, our friend Cam Sully reviewed this at Action Elite, Matt Spector covered it on Bulletproof Action, and it was done on Roger Ebert's site, so you can go to those places to see what they thought.

One Night in Bangkok is a remake of Collateral, with Dacascos as Kai, a Hawaiian hit man out for revenge. He gets picked up by a ride share driver, and tells her he'll give her six grand if she drives him around for the evening. With a sick brother, this sounds like a great deal for her, until each stop leaves Dacascos more bruised and bloody, making her wonder what he's up to and if this is a good idea. The thing is though, once you let Dacascos in, it's hard to quit him--we've all learned that over time.

 

Where do I go with this one? It's more of a slow burner, which isn't always a bad thing. Also, I was a fan of Dacascos taking on a role that was more than just mean-mugging and beating people up--though I love seeing him do that too. He takes the scene I took a screen of above, where he's just sitting outside the airport waiting for his ride, and makes it something I want to watch, which is not always easy to do. On the other hand, the runtime was a bit long; the director, Kaos, used a split screen effect at times that I felt was distracting and gimmicky; and the dialog left a little to be desired, which, when you're working on a slow-burner, it needs to be better since it's propping up the film more. In fact, there was a lot of non-speaking chemistry between Dacascos and the driver, played by Vanida Golten, and I felt like some of the scenes of them in the car together could have been better without dialog, especially with the great shots of Bangkok at night mixed in. Overall though, I liked this different take on Collateral, and the attempt to go outside the usual tone and style of an action movie, especially with how Dacascos took this part and really went for it.

This is not the first time Dacascos has played a more emotionally complex hit man, and one fun similarity that this film has to Crying Freeman, is Dacascos's wife, Julie Condra, whom he met on the set of that earlier movie, is in this as well--I won't give it away, but just mention she's in this and leave it at that. Again, I can't give away too much of what the movie's about in order to keep it fresh for you if you do decide to see it, which hampers my ability to go too far into why I liked Dacascos's performance, but the coolest part for me is that he's playing someone ten years older than him. We're so used to these aging action stars playing someone younger--Van Damme's character wasn't born in 1960, he was born in 1970; or Seagal playing a 60-year-old active duty soldier--for Dacascos to say "no, make me ten years older; make me a grandfather; don't give me the love scenes with the younger actress," to me is not only refreshing, but shows who he is as a professional. And the dialog issues I mentioned aside, I think he hits this out of the park, which makes it all the better.

 

This is the second Kaos-directed film we've done here at the DTVC, the other being Zero Tolerance with Adkins and Daniels. This one works better, but it has a similar narrative to the other film, so perhaps Kaos has a thing for fathers going on killing sprees for their daughters kinds of story lines. For me, what made this more, was how he made Bangkok a character in the way a Scorsese makes New York City a character. We're so used to Western directors making films in Asia and projecting this "mystery of the Orient" tone that's steeped in Western Imperialism--and to some extent, this is done in a lot of DTV films because the movies are made on the cheap and the studios want every cliche checked off to keep us Western audiences happy. In a way, even the title is a play on that tradition, because nothing typifies that more than the song that the film shares its name with. This is not to say we need to "cancel" all the DTV flicks shot in Asia that traffic in these stereotypes, rather, it's just another thing for us to recognize along with the boom mics and other gaffs we catch as we're watching them.

Kane Kosugi has a really small part in this, despite his name being on the cover. The thing is though, he was a really cool character, so it's kind of too bad he wasn't in it more. I think the issue is, as I watched the movie, I don't know how would Kaos have fit him in. One thing I noticed, is in the IMDb synopsis, and the Roger Ebert site review, Kosugi is incorrectly listed as the cop chasing Dacascos down--and the Ebert reviewer actually calls him "Shane Kosugi," so I wanted to clear that up for anyone who gets confused when they watch this. Another performance I liked in this was Prinya Intachai, who is actually the one who plays the cop chasing Dacascos. He brought a New York sensibility to the proceedings that I thought added a lot of flavor in away that hearkened back to an old hard-boiled NYC detective tradition.

 

Finally, one thing I liked about Dacascos's character was, not only was he Hawaiian, but it was brought up in the film specifically that he was Hawaiian. It's one thing for a movie or TV show that takes place in Hawaii to have Dacascos playing a Hawaiian, but here he was representing Hawaii in Thailand, which I know as a proud Hawaiian he must've appreciated. I also think it helped Kaos in his attempt to divorce this film from the constraints of Western Imperialism, as we're used to seeing the American or European go into Asia and beat up and/or kill a bunch of local baddies and save the girl. By having Dacascos say he's "Hawaiian", he's no longer the ugly American or representing the idea of American exceptionalism against Asia that he would've been if he'd said he was "American." 

All right, it's time to wrap this up. This is still available on HBO Max, and if you have it, I think it's worth checking out. It is a little long, the dialog is a little off, and I could have done without the split screen effect; but overall I liked what Kaos was going for here, and I liked how Dacascos took a part that stretched him as an actor and hit it out of the park.

For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt12192190

And if you haven't yet, check out my novel, Chad in Accounting, in paperback or on Kindle!

Santa's Summer House (2012)

Last December I had our friend Mitch from the Video Vacuum on the pod to discuss this movie. It was a curiosity on a lot of levels, as it has some big DTV action names in it with Daniels, Rothrock, Bernhardt, and Kathy Long, plus it was directed by schlock auteur David DeCoteau. I figured now, in July, I could post it as a "Christmas in July" kind of theme. In addition to us, Mitch also reviewed this for his site, so you can go there to get more of his thoughts. Now, without any further ado. 

Santa's Summer House is about some people hoping to go to a resort, but whose van gets lost and they find themselves at a mansion. While the driver looks to see if he can get them back on track, the nice couple who own the mansion allow the people to stay there. You've probably already guessed that this mansion is the big man's summer house, and these people are here for a reason: they have shit they need to work out, and the big man and his wife want to help make that happen. But before they do, we're treated to some croquet. A lot of croquet...

 

This is exactly what you'd think it is: David DeCoteau throwing something together in a week or so, all in the same location, with a group of stars who probably had a week between projects that could be tossed in. The problem is, as a Christmas movie, it doesn't have the schlock fun that a Lifetime thriller DeCoteau's been doing lately would've had. One of the toughest moments was the extended croquet scene that Mitch compared to "rock climbing" and "sandstorm" from MSTK, and it definitely had that element of Deep Hurting. In the pod episode, Mitch and I discussed what we thought this movie could have been. Give us people at a Christmas resort, and somehow there's a hostage situation, and our action heroes need to take them down. Of course, that costs money, and this film was made on the cheap. Ultimately what this is, is a novelty for DTV action fans, and as a completist like me who feels like he has to see them all, I had to do it. If you don't have that desire to see all of Rothrock or Daniels's films, you may want to skip this one.

We'll start with Gary Daniels, as this is his 52nd film on the site. He almost plays the same busy businessman that he played in DeCoteau's The Wrong Child. Again, at least that one had the Lifetime fun thriller element that this one lacked. It feels like we've lost him a bit since he had his 50th movie on here, and I don't know that reviewing this makes up for that, even if he's getting his 52nd tag. It's a reminder that we need to get to more of Daniels's action stuff on the site, especially since I have a bunch in the can that just needs to get reviewed. 

 

The film's other Hall of Famer, Cynthia Rothrock, also hasn't been getting a lot of run on here lately either, which needs to be rectified. She's now at 37 films on the site, and closing in on joining that 40 Club. Unlike Daniels though, we don't currently have any Rothrock in the can that we need to review. I'm probably going to need to dig into her Hong Kong stuff, and see how much of it is on YouTube, if we're going to keep her posts going, as we've done almost all of her US DTV stuff--there's also more like this, like A Doggone Hollywood where she plays "Mom in Car." It's going to test my completist sensibilities for sure. 

Let's have a hearty warm welcome back to the great Daniel Bernhardt, who we haven't seen here in almost 10 years! I have to say, out of everyone in the film, he was playing the jerk character who becomes less jerky later, but to me he seemed like the one I'd most like to go on vacation with. Imagine walking around a resort with him in open polos and linen pants. Let's load up on the best of everything and have our run of the place. And I think a European resort would be even better, with a guy whose Swiss, I wouldn't feel as much like an Ugly American. Total European bros just kickin' it.

 

The superhero movie has become really popular recently, but when you think about it, Santa maybe has the strongest set of powers. He's pretty much omnipotent, at least by this film's standards. He was able to make a fog that redirected the resort van in the direction of his mansion, but also could magically make all of these people book a stay at a local resort. He also has the ability to be omnipresent, as that's the only way to explain how he can put presents in so many houses in one night, even accounting for different time zones. How would you beat Santa then if he became evil? He's like Thanos with all the Infinity Stones. I feel like that kind of power could rip the fabric of time and space. How do you stop someone who could be anywhere at any time? 

And with that, it's time to wrap this up. As of this writing, this is only available to rent on Prime for $.99, which in my mind is still too much, unless you're an extreme completist. If you want to hear more about our discussion, you can check out the podcast episode on iTunes, Stitcher, or Spotify. Thanks again for coming on Mitch, it was a great time!

For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt2350954

And if you haven't yet, check out my novel, Chad in Accounting, in paperback or on Kindle!

Behind the Mask: The Batman Dead End Story (2015)

I thought I'd extend my new Christmas tradition of doing a documentary to "Christmas in July," especially since I have a lot of documentaries, in particular this one, that I've seen that I thought would be worthy of review on the site here. In addition to us, our friend at RobotGEEK's Cult Cinema has covered this, so you can go to his site to see what he thought. Now, without any further ado.

Behind the Mask: The Batman Dead End Story is the story behind Sandy Collora's Batman Dead End short film that took the comic book world by storm in 2003. After directing some commercials, Collora decides to make a short film as a demonstration of his skills. His idea is a Batman movie where he fights the Joker and a Predator. At the same time, Collora's mother is dying of breast cancer, forcing him to split his time between shooting and visiting her at the hospital. When the film is released, it gets a screening at Comic Con, and the rest is history. From there Collora was the hottest property in Hollywood, but instead of taking some entry level films he doesn't like, he tries to strike out on his own, and while he doesn't get the success he expected, he has the sense that he's doing it his way.

 

I really enjoyed this movie. I hadn't heard about Batman Dead End before this, but seeing it now after, I get why there was the buzz. Collora made the Batman movie we as fans would have wanted, and had he had the chance to make a feature-length Batman, we can only imagine how that would have turned out. There's also an element of "pride goeth before the fall," that perhaps Collora was a bit too full of himself and hurt his career in the process; but the film handles that really well, giving us all angles of Collora's life, including the loss of his mother. When we see the video of him speaking before an audience at Comic Con, where even he's now embarrassed by how he came off at the time, there's a sense that he can be forgiven for any brash--maybe arrogant--behavior, considering the price the film took for him to make, and then seeing how successful it is, it had to be a massive flood of emotions. Beyond all of that, I think Collora exhibits the independent spirit we love from directors here at the DTVC, so it's fitting to spotlight this documentary on him.

One thing this documentary does really well, is it tells us not only who Collora is, but also spotlights the talent he had working with him. This wasn't just a fan film done by a bunch of amateur filmmakers who just really had a passion, Collora and his team were professionals, and some of the best at their crafts. The shame is, often for a lot of these guys to get work that pays enough, it has to be on big budget projects where the studios set the rules in an attempt to be as big tent as possible. What Collora shows us here is, if these guys ever got the keys to a major studio big budget picture, it would be better than we could imagine. Unfortunately it feels like the film industry has been going even further in the other direction from 2003, meaning we're even further from ever seeing something like this as a feature-length come to fruition.

 

The one name that came to mind when I watched Collora in his interviews, was Albert Pyun. The big difference between those two, was Pyun tried to make it in the studio system with Cannon, and got burned multiple times in seeing his vision taken away from him, which was what Collora fought against, ultimately hurting his chances of getting some of the bigger James Cameron-style productions he ultimately wanted. The other difference between the two, is Pyun got to make Captain America, and almost Spider-Man as well (Pyun said they didn't have the budget to make it look as good as they wanted, and it ran into the same issues with using wires that the Spider-Man Broadway encountered). In looking at the current comic book movie landscape, you have to feel like Collora belongs there, that the natural progression after Dead End would have led him to being one of the in-demand directors to tackle a half-a-billion dollar Marvel extravaganza--but at the same time, you also have to feel like Collora would have wanted nothing to do with that, because it was the sanitized Disney-fication Marvel that we're seeing on the screen, not the comics from the early 90s that inspired the Infinity Gauntlet and Infinity War sagas. Disney and Warner don't want Collora's visions of what these films should be, because they aren't big tent enough, they would want him to make their visions for them. By the same token, if Collora doesn't want Hollywood, maybe there is a Pyun-like DTV career out there for him where his vision can flourish on the screen for us. I'd love to see what he can do in more films.

For me though the biggest thing that makes Dead End short film work is the inclusion of the Predator, aka "Big Red." In the video of Collora addressing the fans at Comic Con, he shouts out "is that how Batman is supposed to be done?" and when the crowd only gives him a tepid response, he shouts "I can't hear you! Is that how Batman is supposed to be done?" and they cheer. When he saw that video all these years later he was embarrassed, but he also had a great point. That was how Batman was supposed to be done. Clark Bartram was a great choice, a stunt worker and body builder who looked the part and could do all the action scenes. I also liked that there was no origin story here. We all know who Batman is, just dump him in an alley and put him up against the Joker and a Predator. The fact that we don't have 90 minutes of this is a travesty. When you look at the time this was made, we'd just come off of Bat-Nipples in Batman and Robin, but at the same time, the comic book genre on the Marvel side was getting a resurgence. We wanted a Batman redux, and Collora gave us that much more than the Nolan/Bale trilogy we had coming after this, and I'm sure also better than the Robert Pattinson Batman we have coming next year. The reality is though, as long as those mediocre "yeah, but what if?..." Batman adaptations pack theaters, there will never be the impetus to give us a feature-length big budget Collora Batman, which is too bad.

 

Finally, I thought I would use this paragraph to describe what my perfect Batman movie would be. It's hard to say, because Batman has so many great villains, plus you throw in the Predator. Who do you choose from between the Joker, Penguin, Riddler, or Catwoman; plus baddies like Egg Head, Mr. Freeze, or King Tut; not to mention I loved the Joel Schumacher Two-Face played by Tommy Lee Jones, with the really colorful other half of his face, and his Poison Ivy played by Uma Thurman. Maybe what it would be is a Wacky Races kind of event, where Batman and Robin in the Bat-mobile have to race cross-country, with all the other villains and the Predator racing against him. Imagine the fun cars that each villain would have. Or maybe we just remake Predator 2 with Batman and the Predator trashing Gotham City, while all the villains sit and watch. My hunch is, now that Disney owns the Predator, a Batman movie is the furthest from their mind. They're probably going to jump-start the franchise so they can plug up the theaters with another film: add that to Marvel, Pixar, Star Wars, and their own Disney properties, and they can choke the life out of the competing studios by taking over all the screens. 

And with that, let's wrap this up. As of my writing, you can screen Behind the Mask: The Batman Dead End Story on Tubi. Not only is it a compelling watch, but it does remind me of a time before the Disney-fication I described above, when the film industry was more open and less bid tent-ish. Collora is a true independent spirit, and this film both celebrates that, and gives us a great account of what it took to make his great fan film.

For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt3181178

And if you haven't yet, check out my novel, Chad in Accounting, in paperback or on Kindle!

Captain America (1979)

I had been meaning to watch the Reb Brown Captain Americas for a long time, so once I saw that they were on Tubi, I had to give them a go. From there though, I wasn't sure if I should review them, considering they're TV movies, and the only real connection they have to our site is that they star DTVC Hall of Famer Reb Brown. But then, with this weekend being the 4th of July holiday here in the states, I thought, what better way to celebrate, right? So here we are looking at a TV movie on the weekend of the 4th. In addition to us, our friend Mitch at the Video Vacuum has also done this as part of his Captain America-Palooza, so you can go there to see what he thought.

Captain America has Reb Brown as Steve Rogers, a guy fresh out of the Marines and looking to relax and drive his van up and down the coast of California. But then a friend from the past calls, and when said friend turns up dead, all bets are off. At the same time, Rogers's dad's old research partner calls him over to show him the FLAG serum his dad was working on. When the baddies that killed Rogers's friend almost do the same to him, the dad's partner needs to use the serum to save him, turning him into: Captain America! The baddies won't know what hit them.

 

I'm a bit of split mind on this, because this film is every bit the 70s TV movie it's supposed to be, from pacing to special effects, and so it's hard to compare it to a cinematic counterpart; but at the same time, Reb Brown is Captain America. It was like this is the part he was born to play. So then we're left with this thing that should have been a weekly TV show a la The Incredible Hulk or The Amazing Spider-Man, but wasn't, so this pilot and the film after it are just what remains of something that wasn't finished. I think in comparing it to the MCU Chris Evans Caps, in the 70s they couldn't make the suit the way they can now. That bright shiny thing wasn't doing anyone any favors, and when you compare it to the Hulk who was just Lou Ferrigno painted green, I think it had more camp than the show may have wanted. By the same token, it was exciting to see Brown don the suit and start taking down baddies. Ah, what could have been...

We often look at a stars career here on the DTVC and examine how they ended up in the DTV world. Here we can see what happened for poor Reb Brown. This was supposed to be it, the series that propelled him out of his frequent guest star roles and into his own series. Playing someone as iconic as Captain America on a weekly TV show would have opened so many doors for him--so much so we may not have had him here in the DTVC Hall of Fame, though Adam West played Batman for three years and still became a staple in DTV films. In watching this I couldn't get over how much he was Captain America, even when he wasn't in the suit. I saw that Reb Brown did an interview on YouTube with The Nerdery back in 2012, and he explained why the show never happened. Universal lost the rights to Captain America, after which Marvel wanted $50,000 per episode to use him, compared to $2,500 per show for The Incredible Hulk. From there we know that Marvel sold the rights to Cannon, which led to the Albert Pyun cinematic adaptation in 1990. In my mind, that seems short-sighted, because a TV show in 1979 could have led to all kinds of merchandising that would have made Marvel much more money--or the show may have fizzled after a season or two the way The Amazing Spider-Man did. I just imagine me as a child going to school with a Reb Brown as Captain America lunchbox, and think about how much better my life could have been. In you're curious about the interview, you can check it out here.

 

In the trivia there was also mention of possible crossovers with the other two Marvel series at that time, which also would have been too amazing for words. That's what made comics so great, the idea that I could read an issue of Spider-Man and see Cap help him; or even better, Daredevil and have Ghost Rider show up. When I look at the success of Arrow, I see the same thing: they started with the Green Arrow, added the Flash, and it grew from there. Now we're stuck with the MCU, but one thing I did like was how they had their Daredevil series, and in the second season they introduced the Punisher. The problem with those series though was they were 13-hour movies, and by episode 8 or 9 I would hit a wall. The idea of a more episodic Captain America that was kind of like the Six-Million Dollar Man is definitely more appealing to me; and then throw in crossovers and I think it would have been perfect.

One thing the film did that I think rankled some feathers was they took liberties with the origin story. He's no longer the WWII soldier given the serum and then frozen in ice. I was okay with it though. This is its own thing, I thought it was a better product of the 70s the way they did it here. For me, I'm more upset that the Silver Surfer and Adam Warlock weren't in the Infinity War movies than I am about a TV show about Captain America that redid his origin story. It is a slippery slope though, because sometimes we need that origin story as an anchor in order to buy the rest of what we're seeing. I think that was more important for Chris Evans's Cap, because I needed something like that to believe he was the hero; whereas Reb sold it for me the moment he drove his van into the first scene. (And I am aware of why Silver Surfer and Adam Warlock couldn't be in the Infinity War movies, but that doesn't make me any less disappointed that they made the movies without them.)

 

Finally, I want to touch on that point I keep making about how Reb Brown looks the part of Captain America, because it is iffy territory to say that a white, blond-haired, blue-eyed, beefcake is the perfect Captain America, right? It reinforces this idea that "American" looks a certain way and dismisses the many different ways that "American" can look. On that score, I've always thought Steve James would have also made a perfect Captain America. The build, the martial arts ability, and the screen presence all add up to gold in my mind. We live in a world now where I think that's a possibility, but back when this was made--or even when American Ninja was made, where Steve James was passed over for the lead in favor of Michael Dudikoff because Duds had that "all American look", aka blond-haired and blue-eyed--it would have been a non-starter to cast a Steve James as Captain America. It's a shame, because like Reb Brown, where it would have been nice to see what he would have done with Cap in a weekly series, the same is true about James, but at least with Brown we got to see it for two TV movies, while with James it never would have been considered in his lifetime, which is too bad.

And with that, it's time to wrap this up. While Brown is great here, I think it's important to keep in mind that this is still a 70s TV movie. While it's available on Tubi, I think it's a worth a watch, and a great way to celebrate the 4th, whether you're an American or not.

For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0078937

And if you haven't yet, check out my novel, Chad in Accounting, in paperback or on Kindle!