Top Gunner has Eric Roberts as an officer in the Air Force who has a training base for pilots in a remote location. When some of them cause trouble, he forces them to stay during the holiday weekend while everyone else is on leave. After a special forces team grabs a Russian bioweapon with the intent of getting it to scientists in Washington so they can reverse engineer a cure, they need to make a pit stop at Roberts's base. The problem is, the Russians are hot on their tail, and have waylaid them there. Will Roberts's rag tag group trouble-making trainees be able to fend off the Russians?
This isn't horrible, but there is a sense of, what am I doing here? They set up some corrugated iron shacks near an old abandoned highway, CGI'd in some planes, then tossed in a dash of Eric Roberts. Is that it for The Asylum now? This is their Top Gun: Maverick mockbuster? But then there's also a sense of "what did you want this to be, Matt?" which I also get, and I think if pressed, this is probably about what I expected, and the fact that I can at least say it isn't horrible is saying something--even if it's not saying much. The Asylum is like getting the generic Doritos, and I think there's always that first bite where I go in expecting real Doritos, and end up a little disappointed, when I only have myself to blame for not ponying up the extra couple bucks to just get Doritos.
There are three of these films, and I believe that's because this was supposed to be released to coincide with Top Gun: Maverick, but that film was delayed so much that they had to put out another movie in order to capitalize, and then once they did that they figured they might as well do a third. The second one doesn't have Roberts, but the third one does, and none of the three have anything to do with each other. This is now 36 films for The Asylum, which means they're close to one of the more exalted clubs at the DTVC, the 40 Club. On the one hand, it seems wrong to have them in a club like that--wrong enough that they're in the Hall of Fame even--but on the other, they've been doing this Mockbuster thing a couple years longer than we've been doing the DTVC, and they're still going strong...(ish). I think that has to count for something, and for that I applaud them.
Eric Roberts, who is known for his vast CV, is only at 16 films now on the site, which doesn't sound right, but when you look at the films he does and who's--or rather who isn't--in them, you get a better sense of why he's only where he's at. Is there anyone who's better at ranting with the wall of a corrugated iron shed behind him? Like were they borrowing a trailer on a construction site to do his scenes? When his wife called him about this, he was probably like "how many locations and how many wardrobe changes?" and she said "one location, no wardrobe changes, you're wearing an Air Force pilot jumpsuit the whole time." "So I gotta unzip my shirt to go to the bathroom?" "It's just one day of shooting." And like the trooper he is, he delivered.
One thing The Asylum got right was the fact that fighter jet dogfights can only get you so far, so they were smart to pad things out with this other plot about the bioweapon. The problem is, the other plot was kind of a dud too. What the movie should've been was 80 minutes of Eric Roberts in a corrugated iron shed yelling at young trainees. But then the problem there is, you can't get that much footage out of Roberts with the limited time you have to shoot with him. Could you loop it then? Like the same rant, over and over, maybe set to a Vaporwave soundtrack, and the trainees, when they're not flying CGI planes, they're struggling to get AOL and Windows 95 to work. I'm just throwing ideas out here, but I do kinda feel like my idea would be the best Asylum film ever.
Finally, even The Asylum isn't immune to the trend of not using numbers for sequels. Can we blame them though, when they're Mockbustering Hollywood, and that's what Hollywood's doing? I would love to see them full-on Mockbuster that. Like make the movie I described above, but call it "Herring: A Top Gunner Saga." If you're wondering, they did do their own Mockbusters for Mad Max: Fury Road and Furiosa: A Mad Max Saga, called Road Wars and Road Wars: Max Fury, which is okay, but I feel like it's a bit of a mail-in from The Asylum. Why not go with Max Fury: A Road Wars Saga? Come on guys, you're slipping.
And with that, let's wrap this up. This is almost exactly what you'd expect from an Asylum Mockbuster on Top Gun: Maverick--maybe a little more, maybe a little less, but almost exactly. If you need a little Eric Roberts on a free streamer to pass the time, you could do worse than this. You could do better too, but you could do worse.
For more info: https://www.imdb.com/title/tt12226808
And my newest novel, Don's House in the Mountains, is available now on Amazon! Click the image to buy.
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